Sunday, January 31, 2010

I Am Certain that I Don't Know

Jude is 7 months old! I feel like I am getting the hang of this mothering thing in some ways, but there are still times when I don't know what in the world I am supposed to be doing with him. It's like, we wake up in the morning and then I spend the next couple of hours waiting for him to tell me what to do until it dawns on me that, whoa, I am in charge here.

It takes my breath away when I think of how I'm supposed to teach him everything he needs to know to be happy, wise, kind.... Shouldn't I be reading to him more? Mimicking him? Rolling balls to him? Does he need one of those cubes where you put the different shapes into the holes yet? Should I make him stay on his belly for 10 minutes every day even though he doesn't like it? Am I feeding him enough? Too much? Did I leave him in that bouncy seat too long today? Is it going to delay his walking? Does he really need the 1 ml of flouride that I put in his cereal every morning? Why do I feel guilty on cold nights where I get to huddle under quilts in my bed while he sleeps blanketless in his crib? Oh, and speaking of sleep, who knew that getting a baby to sleep was actually under the category of Rocket Science? To cry, or not to cry? Either way, I end up crying.

Sigh. There are moments, though, that shatter my neurosis into a million pieces. I walk into his room every morning and after every nap to be greeted by this huge 2-tooth grin and wiggling legs. Sometimes he even lets out a sigh of relief as if to say, "she came back." Then comes the snuggling--he burrows his little fuzzy head into my chest and sits there awhile as he wakes up. So happy and content. I must be doing something right.

Monday, January 4, 2010

Hey Jude, revised

Our good friend David Dabney came by the other night with a beautiful gift for Jude. David is a really wonderful musician and artist and has blessed our church with his original music over the last year. David recorded his version of Hey Jude for us and then came over with his guitar for a little personal concert. Jude loves music and was mesmerized by David and his guitar. The reworked lyrics are below, what a blessing for our son to have this sung over him.

Hey, Jude, don't make it bad

Take a sad song and make it better

Remember to let Him into your heart

Then He can start to make it better

Hey, Jude, don’t be afraid

You were saved by our Lord, Perfector

The minute you let Him under your skin

Then He begins to make it better.

What a blessed giving in, may Jude begin

To seek the One whom he belongs with

And any time you feel the pain, just call His Name

He’ll give you voice to sing a song with

Hey, Jude- we’ll let you down

But there’s One who’ll never fail you

He wants you to love with all of your heart

To let you take part in making earth better

And any time you feel the pain, just call My Name

You will learn as you get older

We spend forever loving you-hey, Jude, We do,

My hand is always on your shoulder

Hey, Jude, don’t you be sad

Put your hope in something better

Remember to let Him into your heart

Then He can start to make it better